Friendships - An Important Part of Childhood

Friendship is one of life’s greatest gifts. I was reminded of this the other day when two colleagues disclosed that they had been friends since kindergarten and had shared the ups and downs of school years, teenage years, marriage, children and careers. Considering they are both baby boomers, that is some test of time. By today’s standards where everything is disposable, dispensable, recyclable and replaceable, it was quietly comforting to hear of something that had remained constant. When we finally roll up to the pearly gates and reflect on our lives, I daresay it won’t be the material things we’ll value the most, but rather the people we’ve held near and dear.

Our children are growing up in a very different world to previous generations. They can expect to change house, move schools, travel overseas, meet people from many cultures and develop cyberspace friendships all before they get the ‘key to the door.’ Previous generations had smaller lives, moved in tighter, more limited circles and befriended people primarily from their immediate neighbourhood or workplace.

The social and sporting lives of children are enough to leave the average adult’s head spinning. Friendships originate from a seemingly unlimited supply of activities: music lessons, dance practice, swimming training, sporting interests, after school care and last but not least - school.

On face value you’d think friendships would be easier to form and maintain than ever. But this isn’t always the case and chances are kids today will at some stage find themselves floundering with friendships, battling with bullies or rattled by relationships.

So how can we help our kids nurture lasting friendships?

Being a good role model is always a great place to start. Demonstrating that friends are important, showing care and consideration for the feelings of others and a willingness to compromise when differences arise, is all good stuff. Discussing ways to be a good friend in order to have a good friend, gives children sound grounding.

Encourage them to have a variety of friends. The old adage, ‘don’t put all your eggs in one basket’ makes sense, especially today, when children can move schools, states or countries before leaving primary school. Losing your best friend can become monumentally challenging and devastating if they are your only friend. Encouraging your kids to invite several children from a variety of sources into their life, is good insurance. Being watchful for others who endeavour to dominate your child’s time at the exclusion of others is sound practice. Nurturing that special bond that exists between ‘best friends’ comes naturally when the connection exists, but developing a wider social network simultaneously is equally important.

Sitting back and letting your kids fight their own battles within reason adds to their education on relationships. Falling out with friends is always tricky and with children it is doubly difficult, because you have parents to deal with as well. Unless the issue is of considerable magnitude, on most occasions, common sense and time-out can sort out most tiffs. Kids are resilient and forgive and forget at the speed of light, especially when a new game, toy or activity to explore together is on the horizon. Learning how to settle differences, negotiate with mates and compromise is all par for the course for future friendships so they might as well learn it young.

The flipside of friendship is bullying. Unfortunately it is on the rise in schools, not only in this country but globally. Bullying was once thought of as physical abuse carried out in a sly, secret way. Research has shown that emotional bullying is equally damaging. It manifests itself in many ways: teasing, name- calling, threatening, staring and excluding. The latter often inflicts the greatest degree of hurt by deliberately leaving others out of activities.

Psychological profiles of bullies universally indicate that they suffer from low self esteem, despite their bravado. Victims, also fall prey to low self esteem and in many cases resort to bullying themselves in order to break the cycle. Schools have anti-bullying policies in place and discipline strategies to prevent such behaviour, but a bully becomes a master of disguise and their behaviour often continues despite the best efforts of teachers and parents to minimise its chances.

Letting a child who is being bullied, know that they can do something about it, is the first step. Giving them strategies for action, rather than reaction is empowering. Most kids relate to the experiences of others and books on both the topics of friendship and bullying are a great way to share ideas and deliver positive messages. Two Australian authors who have written about friendship and bullying are Sue Whiting and Susanne Gervay .

Sue’s book, Elephant Dance touches on the topic of ‘falling out’ with friends and Susanne’s, I am Jack delivers a first hand account of her son’s experiences with bullies. Both make for great reading.

Elephant Dance. Koala Books.

Written by Sue Whiting and illustrated by Nina Rycroft, Elephant Dance is a touching story about the universal theme of friendship. Two elephants, Hugo and Millie are the central characters. They share a special friendship until a difference of opinion causes a commotion and a parting of the ways. Pride gives way to loneliness and when Hugo’s solo journey lands him in danger, Millie comes to the rescue. The result is a happy reunion, with both characters wiser for the experience.

The text has great rhythmical appeal, which lends itself beautifully for reading out aloud with young audiences joining in.

Bright colours on the cover are continued throughout the story delivering a visually attractive and appealing journey. The target audience is 3 – 8 year olds, but the message of friendship being a cornerstone of our lives, makes it a suitable read for a variety of age groups.

I Am Jack. Angus and Robertson

Susanne Gervay’s novel, I Am Jack, is based on the experiences of her own son at the hands of schoolyard bullies. It addresses the isolation and desperation of the victim of bullying, yet contains just the right mix of humour to keep it entertaining and enthralling for its intended audience – children.

The book highlights to both parents and educators, how changes in a child’s behaviour are the initial warning signs. It also serves as a timely reminder of how busy lives can sometimes leave us unaware of important signals being sent from those closest to us.

The story is woven around Jack’s family life with his single mum, Rod, his soon to be step dad, his sister Samantha, his nana and his best friend, Anna.

I Am Jack, addresses the problem of bullying in a warm, uplifting way and more importantly extends a message of hope to any child who falls prey to this insidious practice.



SOURCE:
http://www.naturalparenting.com.au/flex/articles/7961/friendships-an-important-part-of-childhood.cfm

Montessori Schools Foster Social and Academic Skills

Researchers Report in Science

One of the first studies to scientifically test the impact of Montessori education suggests that Montessori schools can foster social and academic skills that are equal or superior to those in certain other types of schools, the authors report in the 29 September 2006 issue of the journal Science, published by AAAS, the nonprofit science society.

Montessori education takes a different approach from the traditional by employing multi- age classrooms, student-chosen work in long time blocks, the absence of grades and tests and a special set of educational materials.

Angeline Lillard of the University of Virginia and Nicole Else-Quest of the University of Wisconsin, Madison studied two groups of five- and 12-year-old students in Milwaukee, Wis. The results indicated that by the end of kindergarten, the Montessori children performed better on reading and math tests, as measured using the Woodcock-Johnson Test Battery that assesses letter-word identification, word attack and applied math problems.

Montessori students also engaged in more positive interaction on the playground and showed more advanced social cognition and executive control. They also demonstrated more concern with fairness and justice.

The Montessori 12-year-olds wrote more creative and sophisticated narratives, performed better on a test of social skills, and reported feeling a stronger sense of community at their schools, the authors said.

"Inner-city children who attended a well-implemented Montessori program were found to have social outcomes that were superior to those of children attending traditional schools," said Lillard."And they had academic outcomes that were at least as good on all measures, and on several measures were better," she added.

The parents of the students in the study had average incomes ranging from $20,000 to $50,000 annually. All parents entered their children in the school district's random lottery for the Montessori school. The Montessori group attended a public, inner-city, traditional Montessori school. The control group attended another school because they were not selected in the district lottery.

Lillard was drawn to study Montessori education by its close alignment with research on learning."I decided to do a study to see if it actually makes a difference," Lillard said. Usually parents are the major influence in a child’s social skills but this research shows Montessori education fosters improved social and academic skills, Lillard explained.
Funding was provided by the Jacobs and Cantus Foundations and sabbatical fellowships from the Cattell Foundation and the University of Virginia.

Tunisia Riley
29 September 2006
Source: http://www.aaas.org/news/releases/2006/0929montessori.shtml

Children Deserve

Children Deserve
by Sara Wenger Shenk


1. Children deserve parents who make sure that they find the support and nurture that they need so they can wholeheartedly love them.

2. Children deserve parents who love one another and treat each other with kindness and respect even if the marriage doesn'’t last.

3. Children deserve parents who like themselves and who have creative work that they enjoy in addition to their employment.

4. Children deserve parents who like their work and want their children to know about it and why it’s important.

5. Children deserve parents who remember that when children spill the milk that they used to spill it too.

6. Children deserve parents who will rock them to sleep with a lullaby and tuck them into bed with a story and kiss.

7. Children deserve parents who will take them for a walk through the fall leaves rather than buying them another toy.

8. Children deserve parents who take them to the library regularly and come home with arm loads of books about people who dream great dreams and overcome immense difficulties.

9. Children deserve parents who are willing to slow down from the rat race long enough to enter into the wonder of discovery with them.

10. Children deserve parents who allow them to work alongside, at their own pace, and with appropriate jobs so that each can feel a sense of accomplishment on completion.

11. Children deserve parents who are very selective about television watching, who study the program guide to know what quality programs exist and who will spend time reading or playing games instead of lazily flicking on the switch.

12. Children deserve parents who have an extended family network of support and back-up nurture.

Source:
http://www.montessori.org/story.php?id=251

Designing a Montessori Home

Designing a Montessori Home
by Tim Seldin

Organizing the Home



The Bedroom



“We must give the child an environment that he can utilize by himself: a little washstand of his own, a bureau with drawers he can open, objects of common use that he can operate, a small bed in which he can sleep at night under an attractive blanket he can fold and spread by himself. We must give him an environment in which he can live and play; then we will see him work all day with his hands and wait impatiently to undress himself and lay himself down on his own bed.”


Children’s bedrooms should clearly reflect their personalities and current interests.
Even though on their own they may tend to create chaos, young children have a tremendous need and love for an orderly environment. Everything should have its own place and the environment should be organized to make it easy for the child to maintain a neat, well organized atmosphere.

• Ideally, the young child’s bed should be low to the floor, making it easy for toddlers to get in and out on their own. Rather than a crib, Montessori urged parents to modify the bedroom to facilitate both the child's safety and his early independence. Consider a Japanese futon or a mattress without the bed frame.

• By age five, you may wish to allow your child to use a sleeping bag on his bed instead of sheets and blankets. This will make it easy for him to make his own bed in the morning. 

• Mount a nice little coat and hat rack low on one wall where your child can reach them easily. 

• Decorate the walls with high quality art prints of children or animals hung at the child’s eye level.

• Mount a wall clock at the child’s level. Select one with a large easily read face.

• Modify your light switches with extenders to allow the young child to turn his lights on and off independently. 

• Hang a bulletin board on the wall at your child’s eye level on which he can hang art work school papers.

• Don’t use a toy box. Imagine the chaos in your kitchen or workshop if you threw your tools and utensils together in a chest. Instead use low shelves to display books and toys Try to duplicate the look of your child’s classroom.

• Notice how Montessori teachers avoid clutter. Place toys with many pieces in appropriate containers, such as tupperware “boxes” with lids, basket, or in a sturdy plastic bag. 

• Use a sturdy wooden crate to hold your child’s building blocks. 

• You may want to create a model town or farm on piece of heavy plywood. Paint it green and sprinkle model railroad “grass” on it to simulate a meadow. Placed on a low table, your child can create wonderful displays with model buildings made of wood or plastic. Add little trees and people from a model railroad set. You could set up a doll house this way as well.

• Store Lego blocks in a large, colorful and sturdy canvas bag with handles. Sew on strips of velcro to fasten the bag closed. In your child’s bedroom the bag will serve as a sack to contain his Legos. When you travel it is very easy to pick the bag up to come along.
• Make sure that your child’s clothes chest has drawers that are the right height for him or her to open and look inside. Label the drawers: underwear, socks, etc.
• Flower vases: Encourage your child to collect flowers from the fields or garden for his room.
• Provide some shelf space for a small nature museum in your child’s room. Here he can display rocks that he finds, interesting seeds, and (in small cages) interesting ‘critters.’
• Music should be an important part of every child’s life. Set some space aside for a simple stereo system and collection of recordings.

The Bathroom
• The bathroom must be prepared for your child. He should be able to reach the sink, turn on the water, and reach his toothbrush and toothpaste without help.
• There should be a special place where he can reach for his towel and washcloth.
• Most parents provide bathroom stools, but small wobbly stools often do not provide enough secure, comfortable space for bathroom tasks.
• Build wooden platforms 6-8 inches high that actually fit around toilets and sinks.

An Art and Crafts Area
• Set up an art area with an easel and a spacious art table for drawing, craft work and clay. Cover the table with a washable tablecloth.
• Children's art supplies can be neatly stored in separate tupperware containers. Depending on your child’s age, the art supplies that you prepare might include washable magic markers, crayons, paste, paper, fabric scraps and recycled household articles for making collages You can keep tempera paint fresh by mixing it in Tupperware containers that are divided into three or more inner compartments.

The Kitchen
• Make room in your kitchen for a child-sized work table for young cooks.
• Set aside the bottom shelf in your refrigerator for your children. Here you can store small drink pitchers, fruit, and the ingredients for making sandwiches and snacks. Use non-breakable Tupperware containers to hold peanut butter, jams, lunch meats, and spreads. A child of two can open the refrigerator and get her own prepared snack or cold drink stored in a little cup. A slightly older child can pour her own juice and make her own lunch.
• Use a bottom drawer to hold forks, knives and spoons.
• Mount a low shelf on a wall for plates, cups, and napkins.

Children can help around the house

If presented correctly, children from age two to six take delight in caring for their environment, dusting, mopping, scrubbing, cleaning and polishing, and they should be able to do so as easily at home as at school. It is perfectly reasonable to ask older children to straighten up their rooms and help with simple household chore.
• Give your child his own little broom or dust buster.
• Hang a feather duster on a hook.
• Provide a hamper for your child’s dirty clothes. Ask him to carry them to the laundry room on a regular basis.
• The bathroom should have a small bucket with a bathtub scrub brush and a sponge.
• Folding towels and napkins is a good activity to teach the young child.

Three's A Charm

Opening Remarks
3nd Moving Up Day
Kiddie Toes Montessori School
26 March, 2010

By: Divine May Flor Mercado- David
School Directress


They say that three’s a charm.

And I, together with the teachers of Kiddie Toes Montessori School, will definitely agree with that.

We have been blessed with a great and fruitful third year, here at KTMS. Building on the experiences and learning’s since April 2006, we have been successful in ensuring that the learners of KTMS are provided with quality education and holistic learning.

We can proudly say that our learners and movers are a cut above the rest, in all aspects of learning, not just in academics, but most especially in their emotional learning and social skills and involvement.

The previous years, I talked about how proud we are of our learners, of how far they’ve gone in their journey here at KTMS. Today, let me give you a glimpse of how lucky these learners are.

Learners who grow up in schools like KTMS are normally quite different from the students normally found in other schools. This difference is not simply in what they know and what they can do, it lies in their attitude and approach to learning and to life.

Montessori children are enthusiastic learners. They look upon their teachers as mentors, guides and friends. They have held onto the curiosity, creativity, and imagination that most children bring into the world. Unlike so many school children, they don't see school as boring, nor schoolwork as a burden.

Our learners are generally not fearful, nor sarcastic and cynical to their friends on the playground. I like to call them joyful scholars.

Your children, our learners, have grown up together in an atmosphere of warmth, kindness and respect. By now, most of your children are probably bonded quite closely to KTMS, their teachers, and their friends. This is their community. One of our goals is to create a community that has substance and depth, to gather together a group of parents, children, and teachers who share common values and form lasting friendships.

Students like them simply can never be replaced. KTMS hopes that you as their parents and guardians, can see what they are becoming, and can trace it to a large degree back to their experience thus far in Montessori. We hope that this realization will translate to these learners staying with the KTMS family.

Today, as we celebrate our third Moving Up day, we wish to assure you dear parents that we will continue further improve our efforts in providing tools and spaces for your children’s holistic and elevated learning. Aside from the inclusion of Singapore Math and Project Approach teaching methods, we will also use Singapore Science in our lower elementary teachings. These excellent methods of teaching, coupled with our relevant and interesting teaching innovations, our learners are assured of an excellent foundation and ultimately a bright future.

Congratulations to all the learners, especially the movers. You are truly our joyful scholars. You deserve all the love and support of your mommies and daddies, lolos and lolas, titos and titas, ates and kuyas and all your relatives and friends. Good job, kids!

Today, we invite everyone to join us in this celebration of learning. Be one with us! Have fun with us!

Thank you. And enjoy the charming story, the fairy tale that is Kiddie Toes Montessori.

SUMMER CLASSES!

Montessori Method

Article by Ms. Eden

“Character formation cannot be taught, it comes from experience and not from explanation.”

Maria Montessori believed that children learn better and more naturally through direct experience with the environment, with self teaching materials and exercises, encourage children to engage in spontaneous productive activity, while the teachers observes their individual capacities and styles.

The approach does not force children to do any exercise they do not like or are not ready for, and practice independence by allowing the learners to choose their own work, work on their own and learn at their own pace.

Moreover, Montessori approach aims for holistic growth and development not only mentally and spiritually and to prepare children for life.